It is I, Ackmena! Finally back from my shopping trip to Alderaan. All that way, just to find it wasn't there anymore. Whoa! Anyway things have been busy on Twatooine in my absence, as usual.
Leesub Sirln is
putting in for adoption. Yes she is! But first she has to prove to Mos Eisley
Social Services that she can take care of a child without it getting fried by
blaster fire, or chucked down the sub-light tubes of a freighter or some such.
Social Services gave her a doll baby to take care of for one week as a test. Oh
yes. Whoa, I said... and even though its made of plastic it is very realistic.
It poops, pisses, pukes and everything! It even has its very own little winkle.
Hmmm. I'm not sure whether I approve.
Anyhow Leesub had to pop down to the
chemist to take her regular methadone prescription and as there was nobody else
to look after her child, of course I played the good neighbour and stepped in
immediately. Now, Friday is always busy in my Cantina, everyone will tell you
that. So, I admit, I took... took my eyes off this soulless child for... a
matter of moments, only! Put it this way when I'd got it back from Feltipern
Trevagg the baby was covered head to toe in God damn Gotal spunk. I had some
explaining to do that day, I can tell you. That Trevagg, what a punk!
In any
case Leesub failed in her adoption application, and I can't say I'm surprised.
Have you seen how that girl dresses, skintight bacofoil. Gas mark 6 for ten
minutes! Not that it takes her that long, when she's hawking her intriguing topknot
round the cantina all afternoon! Well, I mean.
Tut tut, I don't have all the
time in the world to stand here shooting the breeze with you. I only stepped
out to obtain some cream from Doc Evazan for my haemorrhoids. They've never
been the same since I was shot into space in that shed. I could really do
with... some marijuana.
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